WCK is really into these “Weird But True”books published by National Geographic Kids. They’re filled with all kinds of strange, random facts. She found this one particularly delightful:
And this one:
But she was absolutely stunned by this one, and, quite frankly, driven to anger:
I was pretty stunned by that one, too. Only 90 percent? Did National Geographic rely on scientific surveys to come up with this number? If so, who are these goody-goody parents who make up the 10 percent who do not steal the candy? What is wrong with them? I imagine them looking all wholesome and smug and eating nothing but kale. Instantly, I hate these 10 percent of parents. I hope a komodo dragon swallows you whole! And the motorized toilet you rode in on!
Well, then I flipped through the book a bit more, and I saw this one:
Ah. And ten percent of those lies were told when the National Geographic corporation surveyed parents about Halloween candy. It all makes sense now.