Friday things

well, not good news on my labs:(

My kappa light chains went up to 176mg/L so a 66 point increase.

Lambda only to 13. mg/L ( normal as I am not Lambda myeloma)

ratio up to 13.44 so a 4 point increase.

Not happy but what can you do. I will see my doctor at the end of June. Not sure if I’ll do the video conference or just go down to Sac. Probably I’ll go down. I mean he isn’t going to start treatment yet anyway, but I’d like to check in physically.

We’re still looking at when I hit 500 mg/L so that maybe January. Or if things speed up sooner. You can’t really tell how it will go except it won’t go down.

I won’t lie that it doesn’t upset me but since this month is my 15 year since diagnosis( I’ll write about that later), you do get somewhat hardened to the fact that remission isn’t forever.

Other matters, B had his BMbiopsy Wednesday and was pretty loopy from the drugs but he said it went well( if enduring one of the most painful procedures you can go thru, can be ok).

I haven’t done any grocery shopping since the Costco Instacart last week. But I will go tomorrow as I need salad stuff and milk. I’d like to get to Trader Joes maybe next week.  I guess it all depends.

We’re in for a cool down here in Northern Ca. It’s been hot but not 100 degrees hot, just 95 degrees hot.

I read in the WP another Confederate statue was taken down. It was some Admiral. They did it either at night or early morning and it was whisked away. Good Riddance.  I also read that Lafayette Park where the peaceful protesters were attacked by the police used to be a slave market. One of the biggest. maybe Trump should read( ha ha ha) some history about the cruelty of selling black people.

That’s all I’ve got.

Quercetin has anti-myeloma activity

A study from 2016 came to my attention today, thanks to a member of one of the MM Facebook groups to which I belong.

This study shows that quercetin works well both alone AND in combination with dexamethasone. Let’s not forget that it’s a proteasome inhibitor (like curcumin and, in the conventional world, Velcade).

Here’s the direct link to the study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5216736/?fbclid=IwAR2Nk3FwZ3b8MfAqKUNOz1YXfQ6PU2lcQzAN-eGSMWvVBO7dTD9waNpxXn4 

I have to admit that I haven’t taken any quercetin in years, but it looks as though I’ll be putting it back on my “menu” now. For many reasons, not just because of its anti-myeloma activity…

Quercetin is good for a bunch of other things. For instance, it may reduce inflammation, blood pressure, and blood sugar, as well as protect against degenerative brain diseases. And the best thing is that it can be found in many of the foods we eat every day, including (red) apples, onions, cherries, broccoli, and so on. But of course it’s easier to get it in a capsule format…easier, that is, than eating a truckload of red apples every day. 😉 

A bunch of years ago, when I did some research on quercetin, I wrote that one shouldn’t take more than 1.5 grams a day, so please be careful with dosage. Do a search of my blog for more information…

Anyway…good stuff!

Stay safe, everyone!

Taking down General Lee’s statue!

Finally, some good news.

Virginia’s governor, Northam, is removing the huge statue of Confederate Gen. Robert E Lee from a prominent place in Richmond and placing it in storage.

Hooray!!!

This statue put there in 1890, symbolizes the confederates stance on slavery.  That Lee was fighting to keep black people as SLAVES.

We must be better today and put these symbolic statues in a museum or a park dedicated to the tragic history of slavery in this country and showing how the Civil war divided this country.

Not unlike what is happening today with Trump dividing this country with his white supremists support.  It has to stop somewhere.

Black lives Matter.

All lives matter.

 

Depression, Covid and the search for happiness

I’ve deliberated over the past week about whether to write this post and still am not sure if I’ll actually post it.

Depression is something that I have had to deal with in my family since I was old enough to remember, and something that I have personally suffered from since I was 20. For many years, I fought it, hid it and didn’t really talk to anyone apart from Nick about it. Now it is something I possibly share too readily, but I make no excuses for that as mental health can literally be life or death for some people.

When I was 20 and at University I hit a real low. I still to this day don’t know why, but I spent days and days going to lectures and work, and then getting home and hiding away in my room, refusing to talk to any of my housemates. It took Nick, on the eve of my 21st birthday to begin to pull me out of it. We weren’t together at the time, but he was the only person I was able to talk to….and he is still amazing at getting me to open up when I don’t really want to. It didn’t go away overnight, and it wasn’t the happiest 21st, but I didn’t feel alone. The black void had turned slightly greyer and felt like it was something I could start to manage.

Photo by Eduardo Vázquez on Unsplash

My next major depression was after I went back to work for the bank after I’d had Sam. I tried to go back 3 days, but Sam was quite poorly on a regular basis and if I’m honest the bank wasn’t good at dealing with that. On top of that, they were quite untrusting that I’d make up work, even though I always did. I fell into another depressive period then, and ended up, at the time, much to my disgust, on antidepressants and signed off work for 2 weeks. I felt like a total failure. I can’t believe it now, but I think I’d been brought up to think that depression was an attention seeking behaviour and that drugs were just a cop out. And people who went off sick, (good god I was working in an HR department), well that really was just taking the mick out of the company and couldn’t truly be real….could it?

To this day, I think that the way I was handled over that period may have been the factor that kicked my myeloma into play (I eventually handed in my notice when they said they couldn’t give me 2 days…although they found a way to get me back on 2 days on an auxilliary contract straight after…without the life insurance that might have helped me with my myeloma diagnoisis).

Since my diagnosis of multiple myeloma back in 2009, I have struggled quite a lot with depression, on and off. Not often with really black holes, but definitely lots of grey ones. I’ve had counselling on and off which has helped although my best counsellor is often Nick. I’m permanently on antidepressants, and whilst I occasionally try to reduce them, to feed that ingrained fear of failure, I know in reality that I am on them for life. I think that all my hormonal changes from early menopause from myeloma treatment probably impact on that and so in reality I know it doesn’t matter that I’m on them. They help me so much, to the point Nick always knows when I try to reduce them as he can tell, literally within a couple of days, that my mood has changed.

So, what about this moment? I said that this post was about depression and covid. I’m definitely struggling at the moment and finding it very hard to be positive about most things at the moment. I know that I have it very easy in comparison to many, but this is my journey and my feelings. And I’m hoping that by writing this it helps me to validate my feelings. So what is it that is getting me down? There’s a few things I think:

  • Coronavirus – obviously everything that is going on at the moment is impossibly hard for lots of people at the moment. Especially those with no support, those who are extremely vulnerable like me, those in cramped spaces or those who are losing their livelihoods. We’ve been shielding (and at times isolating) and it’s been hard. Hard not to pop to shops, not to see people until recently, and even now, not being able to see larger groups yet. With some people criticising us for even going out for walks (before the recent change in guidance) that has played on my mind and I constantly find myself trying to justify our behaviour, our ‘flouting’ of guidance (hmm, yes having more than one person socially distancing in our garden!) and when we allow the children to have one friend over at a distance. But I think the fear of how long this will go on for, and how long we will have to shield for, is the biggest concern.
  • Link between Coronavirus & Treatment As much as I trust my consultant implicitly, I am finding the fact that my treatment is on hold really hard. I am worried about so many aspects of that. Whether it will mean that my numbers start to rise (bad), whether that might mean I need a new, challenging form of treatment, whether I might relapse altogether, whether I might not be allowed my Stem Cell Transplant and when any or all of this treatment is going to actually happen. Should I try and go for it all now while things are so difficult anyway, and take that risk that I’ll be more at risk of coronavirus when I come out of the hospital? Or should I wait and risk all the things I mentioned before? I have written to my consultant and he’s looking at timelines for me to try and remove a little of the uncertainty but I’m not sure how much of it is in his hands.
  • Impact on Children – This is one of the areas that I find the hardest to get my head around. I am so proud of both of our children. They have lived with my myeloma in such an amazing and proactive way. Despite the fact that they are often, understandably worried about me, they are such independent and strong minded kids. They don’t moan about what life with myeloma means for them or the limitations it imposes on them…and I can promise you now that there are many. Even now, having shielded for 13 weeks, being taken out of school early, and now, Rebecca not being able to go back despite being in Year 10…they haven’t complained once and are really matter of fact about it all. I worry though about what September looks like as they can’t be kept off past then. So how we keep safe with them back at school is beyond me. I don’t feel that they will be going back to school anything like it was before either. What about clubs? Do we stop them from those too? And then not only will they be behind in their social and educational progress, (something I know I can’t do anything about), but there is then the chance that I’ll disappear off for a transplant causing even more disruption in their life. In the meantime, are they really meant to go 6 months without really seeing their friends.
  • Impact on Nick – I mention Nick after the kids but I probably should put him first. But he is so practical that whilst I have no doubt that he struggles in his own ways with everything he is trying to hold together in the family, he somehow manages to deal with things (most of the time!). But I do worry about how it impacts his decisions on his work, and how he spends his own time. He often ends up having to pick up the pieces that I leave behind when I am ill/ tired/ depressed. He does it without complaint but it must have an impact on him. I so love him for it but wish it could be different
  • Injuries/ Pains/ Side Effects – I think at the moment things are even harder because of all the injuries and issues I’m trying to manage. One broken foot, one painful foot (possibly hairline fracture – self diagnosed!), a knee that keeps clicking out of place and stopping me moving for half an hour, painful wrists, regular bowel issues, eyes with cysts on them and a fat body!!! And that’s all I can remember for now!
  • Work – I don’t know whether I should get back to working or not….if my transplant is months away, perhaps I should – I hate not contributing financially. But then if it might be sooner, there is no point and I’d only let clients down. I keep wondering about doing online training but training big groups isn’t my strength and I’m scared of failing – another historical scar!!
  • House DIY – This is the least of my worries, but is still there. We started lots of work on Rebecca’s room and Nick’s study before lockdown and it all came to a standstill, unsurprisingly. We’ve moved on with work outside which is great, but the work on this house is never ending and one job seems to lead to another. There is so much outside painting to get on with, and with my boot I can’t even get up to reach many areas! And I’m also worried about the indoor work being outstanding – I won’t be surprised if we end up in another lockdown and then will it ever get finished? Finishing it would also give us an isolation room for the kids if needed.
  • Bloody politics – I don’t trust any of the politicians at the moment to be doing what is best for us as a country. They’re all in it for themselves and that is super scary.

So now that I’ve written that all out, perhaps it’s not surprising that I’m finding life quite difficult. I’m not quite in that rut that I’ve been in at my most depressed, but I’m certainly not in a happy place. I can only imagine how many other people out there are having similar feelings too. That lack of control, worry about the future and concern about what life is going to look like after 2020. Part of me now thinks we should give up trying…what is the worst that can happen? I probably shouldn’t admit this feeling, but part of me genuinely wonders whether if I did end up in that ‘not to be talked about’ position, that wouldn’t it allow everyone in my family to lead a more normal life moving forwards. No more trying to wrap me up in a bubble.

I think it is that thought in particular that makes me realise that I have a real issue at the moment. I think I might look at increasing my antidepressants. I hate having depression. I hate feeling that I shouldn’t have it. I’m lucky – I have an amazing family, and great friends. But that doesn’t seem to stop anyone from having it.

So, if you’re struggling, I understand. I’m not sure right now I can help, but I’ll always try. And even if I can’t now, I promise I’ll remember when I’m feeling better. Be kind, support friends and try to understand even if you don’t fully know how to.

And for those of my friends I haven’t been there for recently, I truly am sorry. I just don’t think I’d be much company. Please don’t feel the need to message after this post. This isn’t attention seeking….I just wanted to share that depression is real….and that it’s really difficult.

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Simple Sunday

What the fuck is wrong in America?

The awful murder of an innocent black man by 4 policemen.

The absolutely horrendous situation of the privileged white woman calling the police when a black man asked her to leash her dog( which was posted on a sign right behind her). Thankfully, this did not end violently and I’m glad she was fired from her job.

I’m glad there are protests going on. Something has to change in this country.  Of course, with a pandemic also going on, it’s tricky. I’m just depressed by it all. We have a racist president who is invoking violence, plays to his base, is a narcissist, and cannot feel anything except his own shit.

Something has to change.

In other news on the home front, we had another Instacart Costco order that was expensive but worth it. I spent @$375 for food and then a tip. Lots of stuff was prepper pantry stuff like bleach, cleanser, and toilet paper.  Some good food stuff like tuna, potatoes, avocados, bananas, and more. I looked at the receipt and then what I was charged by Instacart and most things were about $2.00 more that way. I ordered Sierra Pale ale for B and that was $4.00 more. So it definitely adds up but to not have to go into the store is worth it still.  The young man said the store was very busy and the checkout lines long. So I think a good choice. I’ll reevaluate in June about the time I need coffee. Of course, it’s a privilege that we can do this right now. There have been times in our past when I had $10. 00 a week for food.  And there have been times when I had zero money for food. So, for now, we can do this. Down the road, who knows. We’re living on a very limited income which will come in under $30,000 so… we shall see.

Our weather has been crazy with over 100 degrees one day and then hail and thunder the next. today is partly cloudy and cool. At least we’re not running the coolers all day.

I had my eye exam and everything seems stable with my macular pucker. Can’t do much about right now.  I also decided to cancel my crown on Tuesday and wait a few more weeks. I’m nervous about the air filtration in the office and stuff drifting around. I’m not sure much will be different in 3 weeks but I’ll try.

Next week I have my labs so we’ll see what news I get there.

 Barclay has another Bone Marrow Biopsy on Wednesday( such fun) so hopefully, he’s still fully engrafted. He started the Jakafi and I really hope this fixes the GVHD stuff.

Well, that’s all the news here at home. We did finish Ozark and it ends pretty violent and setting up for a 4th season. It’s good drama and Laura Linney is one of my favorite actors.

Flylady zone is the entryway this week if you’re following.

Sorry, We’re Closed

Mother’s Marketplace

I live in Hood River, Oregon. The river for which it is named flows north from the foothills of the Mt. Hood National Forest. Its three forks converge ten miles south of town. My youngest son and his family shelter in place near that spot. From there it meanders through woods, pastures, and orchards before emptying into the Columbia River at the waterfront where I often walk.

My wife and I moved here more than forty years ago. Good fortune came from that choice. We raised our sons in the upper valley. Our first home sat on a plateau between the middle and west forks of the river. The roots of the grandkids sprout from the same soil that nurtured their parents. They share the same legacy of mountain forests and streams; wildlife and rural community.

Ace Hardware

The county of Hood River depends upon agriculture and tourism for its existence. The orchards and vineyards thrive in spite of the virus. Tourism, however, stopped abruptly when Oregon’s governor imposed restrictions to prevent the pandemic’s spread.

The itch to be normal again is strong. But, uncertainty circulates through our community. One day there’s confidence the coronavirus will dissipate in the ether of time. The next you are reminded that this disease persists with an ubiquity reminiscent of dandelions. It’s everywhere. 

Camp 1805

Locals, unemployed by the shutdown of small businesses, return to work with caution. Some retail outlets prefer to continue offering their products from behind closed doors. Some restaurants feel takeout only is still appropriate. Other stores allow customers to browse their wares. A few serve food with revised seating to maintain a semblance of social distancing.

Our health department reports 16 cases of COVID-19. Some have completely recovered, none required hospitalization, and no one in Hood River has died from the virus. Sheltering in place and the discouragement of visitors worked to keep the level of infection low. Now, as we open ourselves up to outsiders, the risk of disease looms.

What have we learned from the pandemic of 2020?

We know that 370,000 people world wide have died from the disease.

We know that the United States owns over 100,000 of those deaths.

Lampoei’s Thai Food Has Always Been Takeout Only. Suddenly, It’s A Great Business Model.

A disproportionate number of the deaths are borne by the elderly.

We know the delayed response from our national leadership was a mistake.

Rosy pronouncements from the White House conflicted with reality again and again.

We know its disorganized rollout of plans and promises seldom materialized into action.

We know, incredibly, the president has fostered division instead of unity.

The result is confusion and the world’s worst rates of contagion and death.

The result is a collapsed economy that still wobbles.

We know 40 million people are unemployed in the United States.

Forty. Million. People.

We Miss Hanging Out With The Grandkids.

We know simplicity, once enacted, made a difference.

Social distancing, masks, and good hygiene flattened the curve.

We know essential workers in a community are ordinary people, doing ordinary jobs.

We know, if we choose to adjust priorities, hope exists to renew our troubled planet.

*****

The wonders of our rivers and forests and wildlife carry on, unaffected by the crisis of disease. The human community, however, restricted activities to protect themselves from contagion. Now, with the relaxation of those controls, what consequences will the latest new normals deliver?

Answers elude us about things such as whether public schools can open next fall. Then, there’s the renewed permission to be going out and mingling with one another. It’s like a blind date with mortality. You hope to be lucky.

I wait. Time goes by. There will never be no risk. But continuing with safe behaviors will increase your luck. 

Just Too Much Going On

5.30.20

Hello Friends….

Not the post I was going to post…
Just too much going on in my little world and the big world…

So in short, I had a really rough week from this week’s chemo. Since I am on so many meds, I can never tell which is causing what.

Early on treatment mornings, I take Dex steroid pills (7 x 4mg = 28mg) before I leave for the chemo lab. Then at the chemo lab, I’m dosed up with more IV steroids @8mg for a total of 36mg. Interesting amount. For years I have done 40mg as 10 pills.

Next they give me 2 Tylenol pills, @ 650mg,
Pepcid @ 20mg via IV,
A slow drip bag of Sodium Chloride hydration drips through out the infusion,
And thennnnnn…. a lovely IV push of 50mg of Benadryl.
Yummmyyyyy!!!!!

Many would not “enjoy” this medication ride as I do, but honestly, with everything I am going thru at home with my Alzheimer’s hubby, sad to say… this is like a “spa escape” for me. The steroids quiet all the bone pain, headaches, and random body aches and pains, and gives me an amazing energy boost. Honestly, I just feel good all over. Sometimes a little buzzed, but all depends on how low my CBC levels are. Then when the Benadryl hits, I get all woozy and cruisy. You know that calm, serene feeling floating on a boat. Ah, just so lovely! How do you spell RELAX! Yep, it’s just so warm and fuzzy and woozy without the boozy, lol. I know many would not agree with me, and absolutely do not like this feeling, but since I never did drugs or booze, I enjoy this medical relaxation. Groovy woozy :))

All these meds circulate and do their thing for about 40, 45 minutes, before they start the Elotuzumab-Emplicity IV. There are various drip speeds and time protocols, but I always ask my nurses to slo-mo everything, so I don’t have a strong reaction. Plus, and you’ll laugh at this, I just want to spend as much time relaxing there as I possibly can. How funny and how sad is that!

I only have a slight stuffy throat reaction to the Elotuz, but really nothing at all during the infusion. I then take Revlimid pills nightly for 21 days.

But then………. like clockwork.. about 36 hours later, all the “good” side effects begin wearing off, and rather quickly, the YUCKY begins… and it’s all down hill from there for a few days. This week because of the Memorial Day Holiday, my infusion was on Tuesday, so late on Wed the Yuck began and really revved up on Thursday and into Friday. I was extremely weak, fatigued, had lovely diarrhea off and on late Wed, into all day Thurs, and into Fri. Ugh… so exhausting. I was so fatigued and tired, I actually almost fell asleep on the pottie several times.

So way back in the day, when I was on Revlimid, I had crazy unpredictable diarrhea, well actually it became predictable. I have some pretty funny blog posts about it, mostly during 2013, 2014, 2015. So here we go again with that, and the fatigue. Oh the awful, exhausting fatigue from daily Revlimid.

And I am just trying to do so much, too much, each day, just maintaining our household, ranch, plants, animals, people, laundry, bills, cleaning, fixing, repairing, insurance, ordering supplies, being organizer, supervisor, navigator and “boss lady” to everyone and everything. Thursday, I just had to give up, and give in, as I could barely stay awake. And I was so dizzy too. I’m not a napper, but I eventually just collapsed on the couch.

This coming week I’m supposed to do the MRI “without and with” the scary Gadolinium contrast. Will I do it? Not sure. Am I worried about how myeloma is raging inside of me, Yes. Do I feel “weird things” in my head and body where the tumors, masses, lesions are… Yes. Do I want to Really Know What’s Going On? Hmmmm, not sure. And I always wanted to know it all, always wanted to know all the details… but now… maybe “ignorance is bliss” in this case. Just too much on my plate right now. Wasn’t supposed to be like this. We weren’t both supposed to be so sick, and at the same time. Just such a tragedy. So much is a tragedy in this life. Didn’t used to be so challenging. Why, body, why did you, are you sabotaging me so much. Sabotaging our lives. Lives we worked so hard for, so carefully. 10 and a half years is a long time to be battling cancer, ingesting chemo non stop. I’m amazed I’m as “well” as I am for all I’ve been through. Grateful yes. Exhausted yes. Answers coming up next blog that I probably don’t want to hear, or deal with…

Thank you for reading and caring, and I hope your life is simpler, happier, and less challenging. But in the Big Picture of Things… in the Big Giant Picture of Things… I’m ok…

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What’s going on?

I am so fed up today.

Don’t really know why but just cross with everyone and wish I could get spirited away somewhere on my own just for a few days.

I suppose if I try and work it out, it could just be to do with lockdown and being fed up of how it is affecting us all. And my foot is still so painful…probably because I’m doing so much around the house and garden in an attempt to not go mad!

We still don’t know how long this is for. I appreciate no-one does at the moment. But with talk of the ‘extremely vulnerable’ having to stay isolated till the end of August, at the moment there is no real end in sight.

I think I’m quite stressed despite trying not to be. I’m worried about my treatment and when that will happen. Will it be too early? Too late? Will it impact my ongoing heath? I’m worried about what to do with the kids when it’s time for them to go back to school. The decision not to send Rebecca back in June wasn’t too bad but god knows what we should do in September. I’m worried about the kids in general and them not really being able to join in with friends over the summer. And those are just the things that I can share on here.

And then I feel guilty as people are going through much worse things and I’m just whining….again

Maybe I’m just tired. I’m not sleeping brilliantly because of my foot and my wrist. But in reality I think I need to get out. I think I need variety in life and the one thing I haven’t had in the past three months of lockdown is variety!! (I know….nor has anyone else!). But I think that’s what’s getting me down.

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Terry Golombick’s new website

Now, I don’t usually do this sort of thing, but I’m making an exception today because I have such a HIGH regard for Dr. Terry Golombick. If you don’t know who she is, just do a search of my blog…In a nutshell, she was in charge of the Australian MGUS and SMM curcumin patient trials…so, lots of experience, there…

Terry has recently relaunched her website and is offering consultations specifically for MGUS and SMM folks who live in or near Sydney, Australia. I think it’s WONDERFUL…

Anyway, here’s the link for those lucky Sydney-dwellers: https://www.mgustherapy.com/

But even if you do NOT live in or near Sydney, have a look at her website, which has some very interesting information. For example, how about those three case studies, eh? Nice! 🙂 

Take care, everyone! And…WEAR A MASK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. the photo in this post is of a purple Allium (ornamental). It’s so tall! And so pretty…Some of my friends think it’s fake, hehe. I took this photo from above…

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Anything new?

No, not really. It’s just same ole same old.

On Monday we went down to Winco, which is @ a 25-minute drive. We went early like at 6:15 am. It was fairly empty and we got everything I was after for the prepper pantry. Extra pasta, salsas, instant potatoes, and lots of other stuff to put out in the barn where the prepper pantry lives. We have stainless steel restaurant shelves out there and I’m using bins to put things in. The bins are to keep things clean and to keep bugs or other things out. We haven’t had any problems out there in a while but better to err on the side of caution. Some things I don’t keep in bins like the canned goods. Plus we will need to be rotating stuff into the house so some stuff I want to be able to see. I have labeled most everything. There’s a little more to do but mostly it’s done.

In the house, I have my closet pantry and then in the kitchen, I have some wine crates dedicated to canned goods as well. Overall, I’m happy with what I’ve done. I think if I planned meals, I have at least 3 months worth at this point.

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I’m still spending ALOT on food but as it is prepper pantry stuff, I feel okay about it. I have a very bad feeling about what the second wave of Covid-19 will bring. People are going a little crazy going out and so many are not wearing masks. Go figure.

Tomorrow I will go to my eye doctor’s appt. I’m planning on wearing a mask. This is my annual eye exam and my macular pucker scan. I probably should do the surgery but honestly, I don’t want to deal with it. I can’t really see out of my right eye but my left compensates so I guess for the time being ( unless it’s worse) I live with it.

It’s really hot here for the next few days so the coolers are in the windows. By Saturday though the temperatures are expected to drop again. last year at this time I was driving to Sacramento every day and it was also a heatwave. By the time I was in the RV it was sweltering.  So I guess its par for the course.

I made a chocolate cake last week.

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It was very chocolatey… I ended up freezing half as we weren’t eating it all.

Our daughter’s birthday is Friday. Wow, 35 years ago!!! We were so happy!! And had waited a long time for her. We’d been married 15 years so, a pretty long time to wait for a kiddo!!