You look at the clock and remember where you were a week, a month, a year ago. I remember we were in Liverpool a year ago. I remember we held a very special lady’s hand all night long and watched over her while her true love snatched a few hours rest.  We will never forget how precious those last few hours were, how privileged  we were to share them with Bernard. I know it sounds “wrong” but we both really feel privileged to have been there.  
I cannot begin to express how sad we are going to feel tomorrow, but for tonight we will remember how we felt sitting up all night with Paula. How grateful for life we were as we sat there and how guilty I feel that Bernard, Karen and so many more spouses whose names I will never know, are now alone. In truth the guilt tonight is fleeting, I am proud to say I held Paula’s hand, kissed her and told her how much I loved her. I also told her how much I was going to miss her. 

I still do.