Mark – where to begin?!? I remember the first day I met you…MU…Introduction to Small Group with Corrine (teacher…blanking on her last name)…you and I were "paired" up. We had a minute to learn as much about each other as we could, and then had to share it with the class…remember?!? Well, I don't remember much, but I do remember sharing with the class that you were a Moron — and you said: how do you know that? I never told you that!"
And so our friendship started! Though we haven't been in "constant" touch — we have somehow found each other off-and-on through time. You are my friend..you have always been, my friend.
I love facebook – in that it has allowed me to keep in touch with you, see your life through your pictures…its ups and downs…God, how I hate the downs…Yet, you have always remained optimistic and upbeat about life. Every down turn created a new adventure – and you welcomed it! I was so envious of your ability to bounce back…still am.
Yet, I read your message…and it hurt…I hurt for you…for your wife and Oscar. Mark you have endured so much, and so much more than you should ever have to. You fought because of your love of life, family, son and self. If ever anyone deserved to "win" — it is you!
And, in a selfish way, I want you to continue the fight…yet I know that if I was where you are, I'd have to save…enough!!! You, yes you! Are entitled to live out your life without undue pain and suffering – and I mean through chemo/radiation and drugs. Undoubtedly, you will have to endure some suffering…and I am so very, very sorry that you will. I hope you have the means to some good drugs to help you through this, and if not, call me! I will gladly get it to you!!!
You, are not a quitter. Choosing to not endure chemical poisoning — does NOT make you a quitter! It makes, and means, that you are a human being — with feelings! You want to feel, to be a part of life — and be able to experience it, in its fullest, to the end! I want that for you!
You have made a mark, Mark :) on many people — of that — I have no doubt. We will all respect you, your decision.
I regret that I haven't been a better friend and been in contact, more. If you were my neighbor, I would be there for you and Femi and Oscar. You are my FRIEND, I LOVE you and am here for you.
Please, rest easy and know that you are loved.
Pam (Hornick)Evans
612-239-4048