Dad’s back in the hospital. He hadn’t been feeling well – I could hear it in his voice and Mom had been telling me so. They admitted him on Tuesday night. They are not sure what’s exactly up this time – whether it’s simply that the chemo isn’t working or if there’s an extra “complication” which just sounds so vague to me. Regardless of what it is, this multiple myeloma is rearing its ugly head again.
They are running tests and such so we still don’t know what it all means. I feel like that’s always where we are with this disease. Unkown. In the dark. Like no matter how much people tell us or I google, we still don’t know if we are doing this right.
I mean we understand the basics of the disease. We know how it will slowly conquer Dad. We just don’t know what fight to fight. Is there a certain “drug cocktail” that we are supposed to try? Should we stress the diet? What diet? Should we be finding clinical trials? Should we force the issue of the stem cell transplant? Is any of that worth it in the end?
And out of any of us, it seems like Dad is one looking for that fight the least. Which makes me sort of sad.