Half a century

Saturday night, we had a combined 50th birthday party for Tim and his best buddy, Mike. Mike actually turned 50 in late Dec. and Tim’s birthday is Feb. 3rd. Mike’s wife asked me if I wanted to have a party and invite their school buddies, that they are still friends with! so we did. It went really well. Unfortunately, everyone is so busy with their families and work, it seems the only time you get a batch of them together at one time is for funerals, as their parents are passing away. This was a nice time to kick back and really catch up. For our family, Tim’s 50th is more than the typical milestone it is for other people. There was a time, his doctors and his health would not have made us think we’d see this. It’s all at once fantastic, and scary as he**. For one thing, what a blessing, for another, it’s hard not to think that 7 years have SPED by since his diagnosis in March of 2007 and you can’t help but think, “how much time do we have left?” Everything is bittersweet after a tragedy strikes your family. I am sad that Tim’s family is fragmented and they will not be celebrating with us. We are civil to his parents and his sister and her family. We do not speak to his brother and his wife, who really started all this trouble to begin with. We are OK with this arrangement. We realize our lives are better not having all these toxic people in it and they won’t ever change, but, Tim deserved better from them, MUCH better. I have to take issue with these Karma-type quotes that you see, because the truth is, sometimes you can put a lot of good out in the world and really do the right thing by people, be there for them, etc, but it is NO guarantee that you will get a lot of that coming back atcha in your time of need. Tim and I are examples of that. We will celebrate with my family when his birthday rolls around and also plan to take a special vacation too.

So, what else? My older sister has accepted a job in Vermont and is moving within a month. She has had a vacation home there for about 7 years now. This is tough for me, in several ways, but, nothing stays the same, as Tim reminded me the other day. She is the only one in my family that lives close by too(just in the next town) so this important part of our support system is gone now. A little scary to think about, but, luckily, Olivia is older now and can stay home alone. It will be nerve-wracking though, not having that back-up anymore.

Our favorite tenant ever, Rose,  met a man and is moving in with him after 3 years in our rental. She is probably one of the nicest people I’ve ever met in my life. We will miss her. The place is re-rented to a nice couple, and, believe it or not, the woman is an oncology nurse where Tim is treated. She works in the leukemia division but knows Tim’s doctors and nurses.

Tim has a check-up on Friday, so I am praying that he remains stable. PRAYING!

Other than all that, it’s typical January stuff going on. Year end paperwork for the business, getting my taxes done, and trying to inspire myself to finally tackle all these jobs I’ve been procrastinating about for years around here. I know I’ll feel better and less melancholy when I start ticking some of these things off the “LIST” but it’s so hard to get started. Such dreadful chores and so hard to find them that important when I’m dealing with such a big problem in my life with Tim’s health. One can get yourself so behind, it’s overwhelming to even get started.

As always, I lament not living the life we want to live. We spend too much time making a living and doing all those things we HAVE to do and almost none of the things we WANT to do. It’s an old complaint. I know I’ve said it here several times before. This year, we plan to try to make day trips on the weekends more. We just have to make up our little bucket list and start making it happen. Time’s
a’wastin’.

Hope ya’ll get to do some fun things you WANT to do in 2014.