Feeling OK and HOPEFUL After 1st Round w/ Cytoxan.

I headed to the clinic early this morning and got there by 10, however, I wasn’t headed back home until almost 4. My platelet count was just above the cut-off for getting a bag of them, but I pointed out to Fatima, one of my favorite nurses, that I had been DRAGGING and was very surprised I didn’t need platelets or blood or both. I described how I park with the valets and sit at the bench for 10 minutes to work up the energy to walk across the lobby to the elevators to go for my blood draw, then sit in the waiting room to gather strength to walk down the hall to the BMT center. I basically PLAN a path of going a certain distance and then sit and rest. She went back to Dr. Anderson, who had only instructed that I plan on coming back Monday for bloodwork rather than wait until Tuesday since the Cytoxan runs me down so bad. After she told him how I felt about it, he gave the “Go Ahead” for bag of platelets and a neupogen shot, which means I will have a better weekend than I would have otherwise. 

Wednesday night I made it to my ladies bible study and had a good time, but I was very grateful that Debbie drove, I just don’t  like driving at night and my back was aching (probably from the chemo). Its nice to visit with Debbie on the way there and back too, I like her a lot. Thursday I wanted to be really productive and I did get outside and work in the yard some, but moving around is really difficult, I get dizzy. I weeded and planted a flowering vine on a trellis and got some seeds started for the square foot garden. I was finishing up a treatment a cooling off when Greg walked in, I wasn’t expecting him until evening, regular work hours, he said he had work to do and was going to the office. He ended up working from home and mowing the lawn and then helping me with a few things outside. 

We were both dragging, him from the travel and flying and me from duh, being anemic and in treatment, but decided to forge ahead with meeting friends at the Mexican restaurant, La Sierra. I had to grab a chair right away when we got there, I got dizzy walking in, but did manage to enjoy a margarita and a taco. I ordered a cheese enchilada too but it was gross, looked like an old tamale. Nancy and David S. and their daughter Emily and Nancy’s sister and brother-in-law from Mountain Home, Arkansas were some of the people at our large table. It was a good time, I am really glad we went and Greg got to talk fishing and other guy stuff with David and Mike. 

Afterwards we hit Wal-Mart and I arranged a money transfer from my brother’s estate for him to get some of the items he has been asking for. I called Cousin Tim and asked him to take the information over to Joey, since he still doesn’t have a phone, and I sensed resistance from Kathy and decided just to leave her out of it. I am guessing she is hearing shit about it from Karla? I think Mom and Dad would have wanted Joey to have the things he wanted, and he supposedly has signed the medical releases we wanted — for me and for Kathy — and they are in the mail. I wanted to make good on my end of things and “treat” him for finally helping us out with the forms. 

At Wal-Mart we did a little shopping but it really wiped me out, even though I rode one of their scooter dealies. We picked up small plants to have in Melissa and Madalize’s rooms for Mother’s Day when they get back. Tonight we are going to sit down with all the graduation and birthday and mother’s day cards and get them lined up to mail tomorrow as needed. Jarrett and Kelsey’s birthdays are coming up, but I can wait to get their cards in the mail. 

Greg had forwarded an email from L in response to what we had posted on their wedding site (to replace what she had deleted claiming it to be “mean” months ago.) I am happy to report that things to seem to be on much happier and peaceful grounds now. I actually just got off the phone with L, after talking for almost 40 minutes about everything from wedding plans to post-marriage living arrangements to A’s graduation to my health and life in Texas. She and I were both upbeat, laughing, and even ended the call with “I love you’s”!! Wow. For the record, what I had posted at their site is the following:

L & A —
Wow its less than 3 weeks away, this is too exciting! We bet you thought it would never get here, and now it feels like time has just flown.  
We hope all the planning and details are coming together nicely. We are praying extra hard for you two as the Big Day approaches and the “hectic-ness” and stress escalates. If there is anything you need from us, please ask and we will try to help.  
It will start to feel more and more surreal, but it is really happening. We know you are going to have a beautiful wedding and we wish you a long lifetime of love and happiness just as God intends. We are confident the two of you can and will conquer the world together!!  
“What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” Mark 10:9
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant” 1 Corinthians 13:4
We Love You,  Dad & Karyn
See you soon : )

Then her email to Greg (which he forwarded to me) was as follows:

Hey Dad and Karyn!

I hope you both are having a great day today. I received this email a few days ago. I am sorry I am just now getting it to you, but I have been pretty swamped with school, and now I’m finished!

There is another email I will forward just after this one, I haven’t opened it so I’m not sure what it is. All I know it that Denise from the Carl House said you could fax information to her, or send anything in the mail that you needed to.

Also, I wanted to say thank you so much for what you posted on our wedding website. It is so beautiful, and we are so excited!! Today we just went to the court house and got our marriage license!! I was really excited and Karyn I think you would comment that I was doing ‘the grocery store dance’ while chanting ‘we’re getting married, we’re getting married!’ the whole time! : )

I know the wedding is going to be the most beautiful one in the whole world, and it’s thanks to you two. THANK YOU for everything!

Love, L

In what she had sent we noted that the final payment amount actually falls short of $6,500 (the final half of the $13K we had signed up for) so I told her that would actually allow us to put a little more in their card. We talked about which of the Taylors were coming and when, and how the count will probably fluctuate a little before its all said and done. She told me about some changes she had made to the bridal party, two changes to bridesmaids and they “lost” one of the groomsmen. She talked about HER college plans, saying she will either stay back and live with his parents to finish at KSU or try to get the courses she needs online and finish from Quantico, because his assignment to TBS has been moved from January 2011 to October 2010 and of course they will want to live together. I came close to saying something about them coming down here for a visit but stopped short, but I did tell her we love it even though it has been a struggle for Dad with work. 

I wrote a long e-mail to Greg’s sister Meg, and she responded with a few sentences saying she had a lot more to tell me/ comment on back, but would have to do it outside of work hours. Its been a few days so maybe she lost steam on that. I sort of hope she does find a way to come to the wedding, it will be nice for Greg to get to be around his family members. Its not very likely to happen very often going forward now that we are in Texas.