Bruised

WARNING – THIS BLOG CONTAINS GRAPHIC IMAGES INCLUDING STRETCH MARKS, WHICH SOME READERS MAY FIND OFFENSIVE.

I am quite thankful that my current treatment does not result in me permanently looking like somebody who is fond of heroin. My girth probably assists with this too if I am honest and adhering to stereotype. As I am not constantly being cannulated (once every four weeks does not equate to constantly), my arms are not constantly covered in multiple bruises. Again, I repeat that for this small mercy, I am thankful.

Cannulas go in your arms and everybody sees my arms. Back on PADIMAC, everybody could see that my arms they were always covered in bruises at various stages of decay. Those wrist ones take an age to heal. These days I am usually limited to a small black dot on my left arm where my blood is taken weekly. The lack of visible bruises makes me sexy. Sex on legs.

Unfortunately, I still have to inject myself everyday. I do this in my stomach, specifically the left hand side of my stomach. The right side of my stomach is saved for Velcade. I would not want to get the Fragmin involved with the Velcade because I am sure I would just make those Velcade scars worse. Now, for those of you unsure what I am taking about, revisit this blog. It tells you what Velcade does. http://ejbones.wordpress.com/2013/01/05/so-long-velcade/.

Last week’s Velcade injection was on my waistband, which was not delightful. It was itchy and swollen, and just unpleasant. It actually made me look at my stomach, which to be honest, I rarely do, because why would I? Other people can look at it. I’d rather look at bums. So, there I was looking at the reflection of my stomach in my dirty mirror, and I was surprised to see a big black blotch of bruise on the left hand side of my stomach. The right, just looks gross, with seven marks in various colours, separated by stretch marks; but I expected this. I never think about the left hand side, despite me fingering it every evening and then stabbing myself with a needle. The size and colour of the bruise is ferocious.

I am sure there is a technique I can employ to limit the bruising. Perhaps being more gentle and less rushed with the daily poke, applying pressure after would prevent some bruising, but to be honest, I cannot be bothered. Doing the injection takes enough time out of my day, I don’t want to give it any more. It, is My Myeloma. Anyway, the Medically Trained People told me that bruising was perfectly normal and it is just what happens.

So the point of this blog, is just to let you know that I am living with a big fat bruise on my big fat stomach. My bruise will be with me for as long as I have to inject myself everyday. In the grand scheme of things, it is the least of my worries.

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