Better (relatively speaking)

Yes, I do feel better. Yes, I feel alright. I feel well enough to tell you what you can do with what you got to offer
Yes – McAlmont and Butler

Day 10 : … Haemoglobin 8.6 … Neutrophils 0.01 … Platelets 17 …

Today I wake up feeling better than I have for the last week. Better because my intestines are not pleading to get out. And better because my mouth tastes less metallic. I guess the chemo (or to be precise, some of the physiological effect of the chemo) is leaving me. Its always a surprise to me when I emerge from chemo.

“Oh, that’s what normal feels like. In hindsight, then, I really was feeling pretty crap.”

It’s hard to explain, to those who haven’t experienced it, how loathsome chemotherapy is. Necessary, of course, I understand that. Put it this way, they worry about people using painkillers recreationally. I’ve never heard any such concern about chemo.

My counts are all right down – I avoid any transfusions today, but I’ll be surprised if I don’t need one tomorrow. In the meantime, while I feel ok sitting or lying down, when I stand up I promptly lose my hearing, feel giddy and have to lie down again to recover. That, presumably, is due to my severe anaemia and low blood pressure. Obviously, the easy solution is to stay sitting down. For the last few days I haven’t felt like doing anything more than channel hopping the TV. Because I’m feeling so much better today I decide to have a TV free day, and catch up on some reading instead.