The Box Incident: Epilogue

After I posted about my box-recycling trauma yesterday, I got a comment suggesting that I find a box filled with junk, clean out the junk, and then use that box to mail the First Communion dress to my sister. That was brilliant! So I searched the basement for a junk-filled box and found one that was the perfect size. When I opened it, I discovered that all it contained was … another box.

The good news is, I was able to use the outside box to mail the dress. The bad news is, I am unable to throw away the inside box for sentimental and safety reasons. It’s the box that WCK’s American Girl doll was packaged in when she got it for Christmas a few years ago. WCK’s American Girl doll is named Francine, and she is part of our family. Francine has more clothing and possessions than many real children in some parts of the world. Jay and I are a little afraid that Francine is going to come to life in the night and murder us, so I don’t want to anger Francine by throwing away her box.

“Throw away my box, and I shall keeeel you,” says Francine.

In fact, one night last fall, Jay returned home to a dark house, knowing that WCK and I were both away at WCK’s swimming lesson. Imagine how scary it was when he turned on the light and discovered someone sitting on the couch:

I’ve been expecting you, Jay.

After he finished having a heart attack, he realized that it was, in fact, Francine, and he texted me the above photo to show how scary it was. Yeah, that’s pretty dang scary.

And so, WCK now has an extra box in her room, because we don’t want to anger Francine. It’s for the best.