Tonight’s the night….

….where I may possibly be crowned Role Model of the Year. Thank you to whoever put my name forward. I know both my lovely husband and amazing sister nominated me for the prestigious title and I feel very humbled that they did such a thing and think me worthy of the title, that is enough of a prize for me. There are four other people that have been short listed in my category so I have a one in four chance of winning which isn’t bad odds. Talking about winning I am starting to feel very excited in the mornings waiting for the postman. I have entered quite a few competitions lately so I am visualising the winning envelopes and prizes to start arriving very soon.

Yesterday I really enjoyed my visit to the Hospice where I had a lovely aromatherapy massage and then a long chat with the doctor. The doctor at the hospice used to be one of the GP’s at my practice in Letchworth and his kids used to go to the same school as mine. He also used to be a mental health nurse so we had lots to chat about. Together we decided to try and increase the pain killer Gabapentin before going on to the patches and seeing if this made a difference to my pain. I have to step up the dose slowly so it may take a while to notice any difference.

I spoke to my HR department yesterday and it seems that they take into account any previous days sick when calculating when I would need on go on half pay. Unfortunately I had taken a couple of weeks off in September for anxiety due to my para proteins rising so quickly and me feeling understandably very worried about it. I just hope the half pay will not effect my pension as I am still contemplating applying for early retirement on the grounds of ill health. I am also concerned that when I return to work if I need to go off sick again in the same financial year I will only be paid half my salary and after six months of this I will not be paid anything at all. I have never been great with finances but I think I need to think about other ways of making money which brings me on to the book idea once again.

I hope you don’t mind me using you as my brain storming group? I did a little bit of research last night and I couldn’t find any easy to read books for patents who may be worried about their child’s mental health. All I could find were books aimed at professionals or books on specific topics such as ADHD or depression for example. So I do think there is a market there. So first of all I need to think of a book title. I think it needs to clearly spell out what it aims to do so the best I have come up with is. ‘Are you worried about your child’s Mental Health? A guide for parents and Carer’s.’ I know it doesn’t appear to be a very snappy title but its quite clear and simple I think and I wanted to imagine what a parent would type into google or Amazon if she/he was looking for such a book. I want the book to be quite basic, of few but important and relevant words and some nice illustrations. I want it to be easy to read and jargon free which might be where I need your help. Having been in mental health for many years now I may slip into jargon mode thinking unfairly that other people will know what I mean, so do let me know if that happens please. I will break the book up into age categories. For example birth to two years. What would make a parent feel concerned about their babies emotional well being between those ages. You would be surprised that many people do worry about things such as, should I leave my baby crying or my two year old is very clingy to me and I find it hard to leave him with anyone. Many parents are concerned that these things may cause their child to have or be having poor mental health or at least emotional problems. Between these ages there could be some signs that the baby isn’t developing as he or she should be so the book could point them in the right direction and towards the appropriate professional to seek advice from. There is a lot to write but as I said earlier I want to keep the book as easy to read as possible because there are already books out there that are far more academic.

So I have the book to think about today and the great problem of what am I going to wear tonight? The tickets state smart dress so I will have to dig something out of the back of the wardrobe and hope it still fits as I have put on quite a bit of weight lately. My excuse for the weight gain is that I need quite a good pinch full of fat around my tummy to inject the growth hormones into, so I have had to eat a lot more cream cakes lately! Hmmm perhaps I may have something left over from the Village Secrets event. Is it really almost 9am? Colin has already gone on his long walk with the dog and is offering to cook me breakfast now so I had better get up from my warm cosy bed and slowly meander downstairs. See having Cancer does have its advantages!

Have a great day today. I have a funny feeling today is going to be a good one now come on postman where are you?

Deborah x