11 days and counting…..

I hope everyone had a wonderful and blessed Christmas! We are counting down the days and preparing for my new journey. I have to admit that I now am having a hard time wrapping this upcoming journey around my brain. I am not fearful but just hate having to disrupt my family’s life. And yes I hate having to ask people to come help me. It is hard to ask someone to give a few days or week to come take care of me. I know I have to have help but it is just inconveniencing to so many. I start thinking that this is all my fault. I know it sounds silly but there are so many emotions that go along with being chronically ill and having to go through so many treatments/procedures. I am overwhelming grateful for all the outpouring of prayers, support and love. Without all that it would be even more difficult to go through what have to do. But again there is a certain amount of guilt I feel for being ill. I am constantly working on not thinking this way. So the rest of the time that I am waiting for D-day, I am in constant prayer and meditation. I know I am blessed and highly favored by the real Doctor so I must act like it. I am also human and am still constantly growing into the Christian He wants me to be. I know one thing though I am faithful to Him and His word. Thank you all for your love and support you have shown me and I haven’t even begun my new journey. May everyone have a blessed and prosperous New Year!! God bless you all!